While trying to upgrade my wiki software this morning I broke my setup. Normally, I wouldn't consider that a problem -- where I messed up was trying to do an upgrade 15 minutes before I needed to hop in my car to get to a wedding! I did what I have told others not to do: to give oneself plenty of time in doing software installations (since errors are bound to happen, especially at the most inconvenient times!)
Now I'm trying to fix my setup but am running into other problems. Please be patient with me. (Besides, I'm about to head out to another, very important engagement -- so my wiki may be down for a while yet.)
The falling sun set the city on fire
That enchanted night
And I wondered if flames came every night
Whether I saw or cared
Why shouldn't such phenomena occur
That lived beyond my ken?
Indeed even the little I ought to know
Is actually out of my hand.
I don't know which is sadder: the row of unread books or the raft of unfilled binders sitting on my shelf.
Something I wrote on Saturday:
When I am sad, very sad, I often try to remind myself of all that I have to be thankful for as a way of making myself feel better. That practice often works so well that I feel selfish for treating thankfulness in such utilitarian terms. Shouldn't I be thankful for its own sake? How difficult then is it then for me to cultivate the discipline of thankfulness when I am happy, deliriously happy? I get caught up in the sheer pleasure of happiness that I lose sight of who and what might have contributed to that happiness: God, my family, my friends, the dumb luck of having had many opportunities falling in my lap. I take for granted what might withstand a taken-for-grantedness for a while, even a long while, but that ultimately wilts away with time and neglect. Today, I am thankful that I can be thankful, even for a short moment on this gloriously beautiful Saturday Berkeley afternoon.