Once upon a time, there was a lovely little kite named Rose. She was six years old. Her best friend John and she were going to school. The sun was shining, a gentle breeze was blowing. Rose and John flew quietly together. [Picture credit to one of the darling little girls in my household.] Suddenly, a strong wind blew Rose into a tree. John saw that Rose was stuck but did not know what to do. Fortunately, Rose's grandpa was following close by. He saw that there was trouble and called, "What's the matter? What's the matter? If you need help, I can help you."
John said, "Rose is stuck and I don't know how to untangle her."
Grandpa replied, "Don't worry. I'll be there in a moment."
So Grandpa headed apace towards the tall willow tree that had snagged Rose. With years of experience of dealing with trees, he freed his granddaughter from the branches. Rose, who had kept a brave face for her grandpa, was so happy to be released and soared skyward in the breeze.
"Thank you, Grandpa!" Rose exclaimed. "I guess it's time to get going. We're going to be late, aren't we, John?"
John was surprised by the sudden burst of speed from his friend. One moment she was stuck; the next moment, she flew with a speed he had never seen before.
"Wait up, Rose."
The two friends caught the winds which happened to propel them in the right direction towards the school.
"Goodbye, Grandpa"
"Have a wonderful day, children"
We are still working on this story. We will also work in some suggestions from ComplicatingtheStory. Here are some ideas that we are considering:
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"The reader will worry at implied dangers, whether or not you describe them."
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what happens to the kites if the wind suddenly dies down?
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what happens if they are late for school? Is it a fierce teacher, a lax teacher?
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since kites need humans to fly them (in the "real world"), how to work the dynamics of kites into a world without humans?
Will some research into KiteFlying help make this story more vivid and compelling?
This story seems to be coming along nicely. It has three likeable characters and lots of action. I love the way Rose rises faster than ever before. I hope you don't mind a few suggestions for ComplicatingtheStory.
B. and I want to get back into finishing this story. Some ideas:
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The two kites are late for school and get a detention. Two kids (real people, not kites) grab the kites before they could get to the detention hall. Scary.
Suddenly, John gets blown into a neighboring tree.
When Grandpa untangles Rose, she flies up very high.
John needs to find Grandpa by flying higher than he is used to. Finally, John finds his friend's house, knocks on the door, and Grandpa comes out. John says, "Rose is stuck in a tree. Come, Grandpa, Come." They flew to Rose.
A few minutes later, when they found Rose, Grandpa realized that he had forgotten his glasses. He went back and came back with his glasses, and finally untagled Rose.
